Med School Hell – No Time To Blink

This post is raw and holds nothing back. If you’re uncomfortable with vulgar language, please turn back.

March 29, 2007
By: Cherokee


One of the things that annoys me most about medical school (aside from the soul-murdering, nasty, vagina-laden OB/Gyn) is the fact that so much of your time is inflexibly dictated to you. I generally mean via lectures, but it can be a whole variety of time-draining nonsense that I’m not going to go into. Lectures, meetings, training sessions, and more.

You’re supposed to be here at exactly 6AM and then there at 7:30AM and don’t forget yonder at 10:00AM, but on Wednesdays you go to hither at noon. On the 30th at 1PM you go to thither, so don’t dare forget and don’t be late or Dr. Pompous Tightass will get his panties all in a bunch and exercise his “love of teaching” by pimping you into oblivion. And don’t forget all of your regular responsibilities! Make sure those colostomy bags are squeaky clean! Oh, by the way, you’re a professional. This means late arrivals are unacceptable and you’ll naturally be held to an unattainably high standard.

All of this horseshit is most apparent during 3rd year, generally because time is already so hard to come by. They just seem to make it harder on you by making you do as much as possible on a daily basis. 1st and 2nd, luckily, have a lot of lecture time that is optional. At least, for many schools. I pity those of you who have attendance policies during the preclinical years. Luckily 4th year is a slacker year, hopefully even for evil schools with attendance policies. But I digress.

Back on point, I fully realize the world is busy, life is busy, and many careers (professional ones especially) are hustle and bustle with very little time to spare. That’s kind of the nature of things. “Overworked people run the world,” is a quote I’ve probably botched. That said, it still seems like during medical school they could make it a little less complicated, less stressful, and more effective. Jumping through hoops doesn’t make you a good physician…it makes you a good medical student. That is, you know how the system of medical education works, and thus you can effectively navigate through the hoops. And when you’re not jumping through hoops you can actually try to become a good physician. (If that’s your bag.)

Since we have Shelf Exams and three Step Exams (I say four, with the addition of Step 2 CS), shouldn’t these exams be enough to make sure one has a basal degree of competence? Why force all of the nonsense down our throats? I mean, do we really need to be forced to attend lectures during our Surgery rotation when we’re half asleep after a 6-hour GI surgery from the call night before? Where’s the sensibility and flexibility?

I suppose it’s the LCME’s fault. In fact, I bet they have a secret ruleset for pimping.

A medical student needs X hours of hardcore pimping during Surgery in order to be demeaned effectively enough to achieve the core competency of self-realization of retractor bitch status.

Screw being a retractor bitch, screw the LCME, and screw all of the nonsense. Give us time to blink!

Are you convinced to leave medicine? If so, you may feel like you are alone. You may feel clueless about what to do next. However, quitting medicine could turn out better than you have ever thought possible. And here is why you should get out …

This article is part of Hoover’s Med School Hell series. Med School Hell reveals the crazy truth about the crappiness of the US medical education and healthcare system … while making you laugh so hard, you’ll crap in your pants.

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